Monday, August 08, 2005

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has been 443 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.


Oh, and BTW, our double super secret barhopping reporter in the field tells us that Jenna was sighted a week ago Saturday in Georgetown's trendy Zucchabar straddling and dry-humping her boyfried (or an aquaintance, or someone she met yesterday, or even a total stranger--it doesn't really matter and maybe she doesn't even know) on a couch.

Kinda looked like this, I'll bet. A little leg-humpin' goin' on there, Jenna? Didn't know you swing both ways. Looks like we're already close to that Mary Carey porno pay-per-view show...

Jenna Bush Drunk
Okay, it's an old picture, but it's still a good one.

Jesus. And people thought that Billy Carter was an embarrassment to the presidency.

So, in honor of the indefatigable nature of those irrepressible twins, here's a new song parody:

Nightclub in Georgetown
(to the tune of Tavern in the Town)
© 2005 Dennis Mansker

There is a nightclub in Georgetown (in Georgetown),
That's where the Bush twins party down (party down).
We see them every night till three,
Because that's where they love to be.

Ne'er do wells, the twins keep drinking.
Just grow up, the country's thinking,
And remember that the drink and drunk must part, must part.
Boo-hoo, boo-hoo Bush twins, boo-hoo (boo-hoo),
We can no longer drink with you (with you).
Just remember that the AA group is free,
Why don't you check it out and see?

They drank in college just for fun (just for fun),
Though they were not twenty-one (twenty-one).
But though he knew it was a crime,
The judge he did not give them time.

What a scene to see them drinking,
Get a job, the country's thinking.
And remember that you should support yourselves, yourselves.
Screw you, screw you, Bush twins, screw you (screw you).
We will no longer drink with you (with you).
It seems you refuse to get yourselves some jobs,
It means the two of you are slobs.

Now they are both twenty-two (twenty-two),
No jobs and not a thing to do (thing to do).
And if you want to know the truth,
They are role models for our youth.

Slam 'em down, the twins keep drinking,
Just enlist, the country's thinking.
And revenge our soldiers dying in Iraq, Iraq.
Salute, salute Bush Twins, salute (salute).
In uniform you'll be so cute (so cute).
We'd like to see you two join your Dad's Army,
To make the Arab world be free.

1 Comment:

Anonymous said...

There is a considerable difference between college girls getting drunk in college than a middle-aged, loser brother who is an alcoholic, member of the campaign for president staff, and who takes bribes from Libya only because he is the president's brother.

Obviously, you were drunk on Billy Beer when you wrote this post.