Saturday, August 13, 2005

A Day at the Ranchlette

The chickenshit rooster at the top of the Repugnican dung heap, normally crowing about his "hard work 'complishments", is in hiding, afraid of a 90-pound middle-aged mother who is camped out in a drainage ditch on Prairie Chapel Road near Crawford, Texas.

Mr All-Hat-and-No-Cattle did manage to trot himself out for some more of those now-tedious brush-clearing photo ops -- we know that's "hard work", Baby Doc, we don't need to keep seeing it -- but he ignored Cindy Sheehan and the rest of the protesters.

Easy enough to do if they're being kept five miles away from you. I could safely ignore the hordes of Ghengis Khan, the Hashshashin of the Crusades, even the nightstalking vampire-ghouls from The Omega Man, if they were being restrained at gunpoint five miles away from me.

And how much fucking brush is there at the ranchlette, if even a barely-functioning moron has to take that many vacations to clear it? I've been to Texas, and I know that brush just doesn't grow that fast.

I think they are trucking it in. Under cover of darkness, a long convoy of Texas Agricultural Commission Humvees -- the kind with all the armor, the kind we are not sending to Iraq -- rumbles in from Crawford and McGregor and east, west, south and north of there with loads of brush. Texas Air National Guard troops -- god forbid they should have to go to Iraq -- quickly and efficiently unload the brush and jam it into pre-drilled holes in the sunbaked dirt of the Bush Ranchlette.

Come sunup the convoys are gone and Baby Doc can swagger out with that patented hard-work-smirk and pretend to clear the brush. Hard work. Hard work.

And he even has the goddam balls to call it a ranch! Last I heard, a ranch was, according to the dictionary, "An extensive farm, especially in the western United States, on which large herds of cattle, sheep, or horses are raised."

All hat, no cattle: Pretty much sums it up.

BTW, that used to be a pejorative term down in Texas, but Baby Doc is probably proud of it.

4 Comments:

Words Have Power said...

All hat and no cattle is certainly a great discription of the Kennibunkport Kowboy.

Since American taxpayers are paying for all the improvements and security at the ranch anyway, I would be willing to check a box on my 1040 and donate $1 to brush clearing so that the President could dedicate his time to doing his primary job.

Do you think that the Secret Service helps him or do they just keep watch for rabid armadillos?

Check out our latest war post and Republican war song at Words Have Power.

Words Have Power said...

All hat and no cattle is certainly a great discription of the Kennibunkport Kowboy.

Since American taxpayers are paying for all the improvements and security at the ranch anyway, I would be willing to check a box on my 1040 and donate $1 to brush clearing so that the President could dedicate his time to doing his primary job.

Do you think that the Secret Service helps him or do they just keep watch for rabid armadillos?

Check out our latest war post and Republican war song at Words Have Power.

Words HAve Power said...

Sorry. Stupid left click button.

merlallen said...

I've often pictured an army of grounds keepers with post hole diggers planting brush in the middle of the night for chicken george to cut.
And when will they stop calling that former pig farm a ranch?