"Spitting on Veterans" -- It Just Won't Go Away

I've blogged before in this space on the whole bogus spitting-on-Vietnam-veterans meme and what a pussy it makes of those Vietnam vets who have, over the years, convinced themselves of the truth of these incidents, when in fact there are absolutely zero contemporary accounts of it actually happening.

But it's one of those things, like so many other Urban Legends, that just won't die. The lead paragraph of this recent story out of Tyler, Texas, is another example of it.

I don't know if these three vets actually said that to the reporter or if she took it on herself to toss it in because it would jazz up a story about a vandalized Vietnam veterans memorial, but either way it's an insult. I'd like it to die, but I guess that's too much to hope for.

Sadly, two hundred years from now (assuming we last that long as a species -- a doubtful proposition) that will still be one of the factoids about the Vietnam War that people "know".

The Last Throes are the Worst Throes

Hard to believe that we've been in the "last throes" of the insurgency in Iraq since 2004. Time flies when you're having fun.

Eleven US servicemen were killed yesterday! That makes 70 deaths just this month. We're now on track to have the worst month for deaths since January 2005.

And that's against a backgound of sectarian violence that in September alone has killed 2600 Iraqis.

And yet Darth Cheney said just yesterday on the Rush "Oxycontin Cowboy" Limbaugh show that things are going well in Iraq! I wonder what it would take for him to say things weren't going well? A nuclear explosion in the Green Zone? A total meltdown of the oil-rich desert into a huge asphalt parking lot? A Roman candle up his ass?

How can these fuckers keep this up? How can they just keep lying to us with a straight face? And how can so many people continue to believe those lies?

It boggles the mind. It really does.

Obituary -- US Constitution 1789-2006

Today the US Constitution was officially declared dead, with the signing of the death certificate by attending physician George W. "Baby Doc" Bush.

The Constitution's health had been in jeopardy since late 2000 when it suffered a debilitating stroke; it had remained on life supports for the several ensuing years.

In 2004 and again in early 2006 it staged what appeared to be a rally, only to slip back into a coma. Finally, in September 2006, radical surgery removed a number of moribund parts of the Bill of Rights, deemed malignant growths by the surgeons in the US Senate and Doctor Bush.

The operation was a success but unfortunately the patient died.

The Constitution is survived by a distant relative, the Magna Carta, still living in Great Britain, and its bastard offspring, American Fascism.

Another Rethug Congressman in the Crosshairs

From our "never rains but it pours" department, US Rep Curt Weldon (R-Corrupt) is the subject of an FBI probe of possible influence peddling, using his own daughter.

So what does Faux News lead with? Weldon's concern about the "timing" of the FBI raid, this close to the election.

As if the Democrats could control it. As if the Justice Department isn't headed by one Alberto "Torquemada" Gonzales, consigliere to the BFEE, who is perfectly capable of stalling any FBI investigation -- and especially an FBI raid -- until after the election.

So who did order the raid, and why was it this close to the election? Is Weldon being thrown overboard by the Rethugs? Or is it that the tide has finally shifted to the point that they can do nothing to stem it?

Jesus, if the Democrats aren't careful, even they won't be able to fuck this one up and lose again.

Longest Undefended Border? No more.

It used to be a matter of pride for the US and Canada, bragging rights on having the longest undefended border in the world.

Now that's history. US Army Blackhawk helicopters are doing armed patrols of the border between Montana and Alberta. Unmanned drones are scheduled to be added to the choppers. All of this to protect our northern border. Why not just build another fence, like we are doing on the southern border?

BTW, you'll note from the Google news search that nearly all of the sources for this information are Canadian. You don't see a whole lot in the American media about this kind of stuff.

Besides, I've always maintained that the fence isn't there to keep THEM out; it's to keep US in.

The Big Database

I'm sure I'm in it. You're probably in it. Everyone who reads this blog is probably in it.

It's the huge Dept of Defense database on anti-war demonstrators, pacifists, quakers and other traitors. They've managed to list us all as potential terrorists.

Read the NYTimes article (login required -- try Bugmenot.com for one it it asks) for a chilling glimpse in the fascism that is slowly surrounding us on all sides.

Yeah, won't be long until those of over here in Left Blogistan will be rounded up in the middle of the night for "extraordinary rendition" and taken to a sports stadium a la Argentina and Chile in the bad old days.

A woman I met a number of years ago was reading Prisoner Without a Name, Cell Without a Number one day, and I told her then that it could happen very easily here. She argued with me, of course, telling me that our Constitution wouldn't allow it.

Really? I wonder where she is now and if she still agrees.

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 874 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

The son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna. Will they follow him?

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597 2605 2619 2641 2710 2737 2758
Total coalition forces dead: 237
Total Iraqi Dead: 600,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1858
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1306
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1268
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 241
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 87.

It is still 850 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic in November!

Friday Cat Blogging

Turkish Author Wins Nobel Prize for Literature

The Nobel Prize committee has a history of choosing relatively obscure writers for the award of the Lit prize (one reason why my own hopes are still alive), and this year's choice was no different.

Orhan Pamuk is this year's recipient; he's been called the "voice of a divided country" for his lay-it-on-the-line statements about Turkish genocide against the Armenians.

I used to live in California, and I can tell you that there is no better illustration of William Faulkner's dictum that "the past isn't history; it isn't even past" than the absolute hatred that the Armenians feel for the Turks.

So it's really interesting to me that a writer who was recently on trial for "insulting Turkishness" has been elevated to the select ranks of Nobel Prize winners.

Turkey, of course, is caught in the middle. They want to join the European Union so bad they can taste it, but along with that membership is the requirement that they have to give at least lip service to the basic concepts of freedom of speech.

I'll admit that I haven't read any of Pamuk's work, but that's going to change as soon as possible. I was an English major in college, and it's always been a point of pride to me that I read at least one book by each Nobel Prize Lit winner.

And, in a somewhat related story, the French parliament voted to make it a crime to deny the Turkish genocide against Armenia. Of course France has nearly a half a million Armenians, one of the most populous populations in Europe, so maybe that had something to do with it.

Nevertheless, I do find it both amusing and ironic that the French would make free speech a crime at the same time that the Nobel committee is rewarding free speech, and both on the same issue.

New Casualty Count

Researchers from the prestigious Johns Hopkins have now come up with a new estimate of the number of Iraqi civilians killed since the Iraq War Illegal Occupation began.

It's over 655,000!!!

Which is about twenty times the estimate that Baby Doc gave us sometime earlier this year.

When he was called on this by a CNN reporter, his response was typical: "Nun-unh! Are not! Take it back!"

You Gotta Be Kidding Me...

So. North Korea allegedly exploded a "newkuler" weapon. Never mind that scientists are at odds over whether it really was nuclear. Never mind that Baby Doc himself approved -- and paid for -- the export of the raw materials for the newkuler weapon back in 2002. Never mind the fact tha there's an election coming up and we've pretty much run into the ground any "threats" from our unindicted co-conspirators in Al Qaeda.

But none of that is stopping Baby Doc from calling it "provocative"...

Provocative??? WTF??!!

Provocative is Denise Richards in Playboy.

Far be it from me to say anything negative about our Fearless Leader, but...

Does anyone else think that this stinks? That this seems like a huge fraud, to put us back into the "scare zone" since we've pretty much run out the well on the Middle East threats?

Here's what I think: I think that Kim Il Jong and the so-called "communist" North Korea is a wholly-owned subsidiary of Bushco/Unification Church, and the whole thing is a phony-baloney scare tactic to frighten the Moron-American Voting Bloc into voting for Rethug candidates, on the completely bogus "national security" platform.

Wait and see if I'm right. Remember, you saw it here first.

VA Cutbacks Turn Deadly

Right in my own backyard, an aging WWII veteran named Clinton Fuller went to the VA hospital in Spokane, Washington, where he died in front of the building because they did not have the staff and equipment to man a 24-hour emergency medicine department.

Budget cutbacks at the VA, we are told. So sorry. "Stuff" happens. You go with the medical you've got, not the medical care you want or would like to have.

Tell that to Clinton Fuller and his family, who believed right up to the biter end that they could get the health care they were promised from the VA.

Read the whole sorry story here, by VA Watchdog's Larry Scott, and prepare to get pissed off.

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 867 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

The son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna. Will they follow him?

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597 2605 2619 2641 2710 2737
That's 27 in ONE WEEK! And we've been in the "last throes" of the insurgency since 2004.
Total coalition forces dead: 237
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1851
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1299
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1261
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 234
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 80.

It is still 857 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic in November!

Friday Cat Blogging

Oh, the Irony, the Irony

I swear you can't make this shit up. A "concerned parent" in Texas (surprise) has started a movement to have a book banned from the local school 10th grade reading assignment list.

So what's the book? Huckleberry Finn? Lady Chatterley's Lover? Tropic of Cancer?

Nope, it's -- get this -- Fahrenheit 451!!!

A book about censorship and book burning! And the reading assignment was given out during National Banned Book Week!!

It's just too much. Like I say, you can't make this shit up.

Hastert Gets the Blunt Boehner

After being caught lying on the bloviating gasbag's show the other day, you'd think he'd show a little bit of remorse and shame. Instead he's not going to step aside for the good of the party.

His loyal henchmen, Boehner and Blunt, are falling over their own feet trying to distance themselves from the hapless speaker: "Hastert? Hey, I barely know the guy."

Even Joe Scarborough says that the Rethugs have gone too far, that Hastert has to go, and that the Dems are going to take back Congress next month.

So either way, Hastert is toast. If he steps aside now, it's too late to save face or anything else. And if he hangs in there, he's a handy hook for the Dems to hang the scandal hat on.

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning." -- Robert Duvall in Apocalypse Now

"Gay Bashing" and the Foley Scandal

One of the most bizarrely comical things that has surfaced in all this is the statement made several times by different spokesmouths on the right that the Rethugs didn't want to do anything about Foley because it would be seen as "gay bashing".

Yeah, the party that discharges from the military Arabic speakers who just happen to be gay, the party that opposes each and every gay civil rights law that comes along, from partner benefits to gay marriage, now that's my idea of a party that's afraid of seeming like they are "gay bashers".

Sorry, guys, that spin cycle is broken. Try a different washing machine.

It's Called "Perjury", Condi

It's lying under oath. Remember the mock outrage when Clinton "lied" about something inconsequential? Where's the similar outrage over the Rice lies?

Take a look at this list of statements that Kindasleazy made -- under oath -- to the 9/11 Commission, along with the actual reality-based facts associated with those statements.

She is a born-again liar and she's at it again. When confronted with the story of the now-infamous meeting on July 11, she first denied it, then said it happened but she didn't remember it. And now she's throwing a tantrum, acting like a petulant teenager busted coming in after curfew.

She says it's "incomprehensible" that she would ignore warnings of an Al Qaeda attack. Yeah, that's what we're all thinking, Condi. So why did you do it?

It would be a lot funnier if it weren't so tragic. This is another member of the BFEE cabal that needs to be frogmarched in orange coveralls before the court of justice at The Hague.

More on Foley

It seems that the House leadership was aware of Child Molester Republican Foley's predilections for nearly a year: In January they banned him from the Library of Congress reading room because he kept bending the pages over... (Thanx to Stephanie Miller for that one)

So, on a more serious note: How long will it be before they try to blame it on the "liberal media" and Bill Clinton?

"Divided" Opinion

It wasn't on Faux News, although it wouldn't surprise me if it showed up there. I'm talking about a headline in the print-version of Faux News, the rightwing Moonie-owned Washington Times: "Black Opinion Divided on Allen" in the Virginia senate race.

Yeah, if you can say that 999 out of 1000 people think that breathing air is a requirement, and one lone nut holdout says that we don't need it, then you have the basis for saying that people are "divided" about the need for air. This makes about as much sense.

But that's how wingnut media works. The truth is something to be spun, to be shaded, to be nuanced, and if all that fails, to be ignored, stomped on, set fire to and eradicated.

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 860 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

The son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna. Will they follow him?

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

Finally, Some Fiscal Restraint -- On the Backs of Veterans, Naturally

I have continually faulted the Baby Doc Maladminstration for its reckless ways in spending our money like a drunken sailor on shore leave in Manila. Now I'll have to take it all back.

Seems they are trying to save some money. And, big surprise, it's coming out of the Department of Veterans Affairs. To the tune of THREE BILLION DOLLARS in budget shortfalls. All because the VA once again "misunderestimated" the cost of care for blown-up and shot-up soldiers shipped back from the sandbox.

This is yet another example of the hatred and contempt this maladminstration feels for our veterans, and it is beyond me -- really beyond my powers of imagination -- to understand the support that the motherfuckers are still receiving from active duty military and veterans.

It's insulting, actually, and humiliating to be a fellow veteran with these morons. It's not fair, but we all tend to get tarred with the same brush, and the blind pig supporters of Baby Doc have the same blood of the innocent on their hands as all the corrupt and evil BFEE fascististas.

More (Not) Surprising News from the Party of "Family Values"

Congressmen Mark Foley (R-Child Molester) resigned from Congress after the contents of several emails that he sent to a sixteen-year-old male congressional page became public.

And the Repugs are widely known as the party of family values and quashing queers. Why I have no idea. This is a common theme among the Repugs, and for the life of me I can't understand how they KEEP getting away with it.

Oh, and BTW: It's even better because Foley was one of the sponsors of the Internet Pornograph bill...

Like I say, how sweet it is.

Say Goodnight, Georgie

From our Never Rains But What It Pours Department, we learn that George "Macaca" Allen's bid for the Senate from Virginia is now on life supports and not expected to last the night.

Ever since the now-infamous "macaca" comment, compounded with Allen trying awkwardly to hide his Jewish heritage, the progressive voters in Virginia have declared him anathema.

Now, from the right, an apparently neo-confederate group called the Sons of Confederate Veterans is disowning him, because of his scurrilous comments on the Confederate Battle Flag: Allen expressed "regret for displaying the flag ... he hasn't always realized some view it as a symbol of intolerance".

Jesus, you have to wonder where Allen and the rest of these people were for the last 50 years.

So for Allen, it's a case of damned if you do, damned if you don't. Apologize for being a racist, apologize for NOT being a racist, apologize for having a pork-shop-waving ham-sandwich-eating Jewish mother...

Hard to believe that just a few months ago this bozo was on the short list of potential Rethug presidential candidates.

But ah, how sweet it is when the mighty fall from grace.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597 2605 2619 2641 2710
Total coalition forces dead: 235
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1844
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1291
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1254
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 228
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 73.

It is still 864 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic in November!

Iva Toguri D'Aquino -- aka "Tokyo Rose" -- RIP

On the 26th of September, little noted in the MSM, Ikuko "Iva" Toguri D'Aquino died in Chicago.

More famously known as the Japanese-American "traitor" Tokyo Rose (who, BTW, never existed, under any pseudonym -- Toguri actually broadcast under the name Orphan Ann), Toguri was arrested after WWII, convicted of treason and sentenced to a long prison term.

With the active agitation of the American Legion. Naturally.

Back in those days we were afflicted, as we are now, with a you're-either-with-us-or-against-us mentality, and it wasn't until the Ford Administration of the 1970s that Iva was pardoned by the US government.

That pardon, BTW, was the direct result of "activist journalism" of the kind that we never see any more. Too bad. When I finally get arrested for treason (among other charges), it's sad to think that there just won't be any activist journalists out there who will give a shit about the truth.

And, just in case you're wondering, even the conservative media knows the truth about Iva D'Aquino.

Mozart Opera Cancelled in Germany

I am a big opera fan -- my wife and I have had season tickets to the Seattle Opera for several years -- so it's with more than a little interest that I note the cancellation of Mozart's Idomeneo in Berlin ... before a single performance!

Not because there were protests, riots, complaints, or even strongly-worded letters to the editor -- there weren't. It was because the opera showed King Idomeneo on stage parading around the severed heads of Buddha, Jesus, Mohammad and the sea god Poseidon.

The potential for upset among Muslims was cited as a reason for the cancellation. No mention was made of the ardent fundamentalist Poseidonists in the audience...

Okay, I'm of two minds about this: I believe that art for art's sake is a valuable concept, and that great art challenges the viewer. On the other hand, given the deplorable state of fundamentalist religious fervor in the world at large, to continue with the show as staged would just be asking for it. At the least I would expect an angry mob of Poseidonistas to storm the theatre -- maybe even plant a bomb or two to go off during a performance.

In Germany. In this country, it would of course be the Xian fundos making all the racket, storming the theatre, etc.

Interestingly, this particular bit of stagecraft was not even in the opera as originally envisioned by Mozart. It's a very recent addition. So maybe the answer would have been to continue the opera, but without this particular bit of business which is guaranteed to offend religious (in)sensibilities.

I really don't have an answer, except to say that it was overkill to cancel the entire opera over this. This is the kind of self-censorship that entirely too many people are engaging in these days, and we can't let ourselves fall into the trap of being afraid to offend someone. The right of free speech includes the right to say shit that is offensive.

The corollary is that people have a right to be offended, but they do not have the right to riot and blow up an opera house over it.

Condi the Congenital Liar

In a predictable huff, Condi Rice claimed in the wake of the Chris Wallace/Faux News spanking administered by the Big Dog that the Clinton Administration had not left the incoming Baby Doc Maladministration any kind of a plan to deal with Al Qaeda.

Wrong. Once again, wrong. Raw Story has the juice on this, yet another in a never-ending series of lies coming out the yapping maws of the minions of the BFEE.

Check it out. Not satisfied with just a retelling, they've reproduced photocopies of the actual memo. Read it and see for yourself who's telling the truth and who's lying.

Flag Desecration?

Take a look at this photo:

It seems to me that stepping on the flag is something that used to be called "flag desecration" and I am certain will be prohibited in the proposed constitutionally amendment being touted by the right wing.

. . .

So what are we to make of this photo, wherein it is revealed that the feet trampling that flag belong to Fearless Leader and Pickles?

I got these photos over at the Unknown News site, where they have a Reuters photo essay on Baby Doc's visit to a NYPD firehouse to commemorate 9-11.

I guess nothing says "honor the memory of 9-11" like trampling on the American flag.

Olberman Dishes Some Monkey Smackdown

Keith Olberman, who runs the Countdown show over on MSNBC that has become true "must-see" television, last night delivered a smackdown to Der Monkey Fuehrer that has to be seen.

Over at Crooks and Liars you can catch the video, or read the transcript.

Olberman is the natural heir to the great Edward R. Murrow, and he seems to be almost alone in his committment to true journalism and the concept of the Fourth Estate. More power to him. Let's hope his example will help the weak-kneed sob-sisters in the media to develop some balls and start doing the jobs they are supposed to be doing.

How a Democrat is Supposed to Act

Bill Clinton bitch-slapped Chris Wallace nearly to tears yesterday on Fox News, and it was great political theater. For those who missed it, you can see the replay over at YouTube.

This is the kind of thing I want to see a lot more of in Democrats: some good old fashioned kick-ass take-no-prisoners bad-attitude assaults on the lying liars in the wingnut media. Leave it to the best president in the last 40+ years to come out swinging and show the lily-livered pantspissers in the Democratic party how it's done.

Now I'm hoping that they'll learn their lesson and show some fucking backbone for a change. Time to stand up to the assholes at Faux News and the rest of the media. Take back our country!!!

Oil Prices Drop; Gas Now at $2.38 -- Surprise, Surprise

Yep, must have an election coming up. Amazingly, crude oil prices are dropping below $60 a barrel and the price of gas is falling down to 2005 levels.

Big Oil and the BFEE think the American people are really stupid, to fall for this disgustingly transparent ploy.

And sadly, they are, by and large, correct. They've got it down to a science and have been able to play the Moron-American voting bloc like a well-tuned fiddle for lo these many years.

But there is an election coming up, and they may have outsmarted themselves this time. With guys like Sherrod Brown in Ohio and Jim Webb in Virginia, we have a real chance of taking back congress.

Get out and volunteer for your local Democratic candidate. All politics is local, and you can make a difference.

I'm Back

As promised, it's Monday and I'm back in action. But I am still profoundly exhausted from this ordeal. My wife the nurse says that it's because of the excision of the lymph nodes, which makes sense.

So my thumb is healing up nicely, as is the gash under my arm, and I am back to work fulltime now. I'll have a couple of posts today, and little by little I'm getting back into the swing of things.

Thanks again to all of you for your words of encouragement and the healing thoughts you sent my way.

--Farnsworth

Update

Just so you all know that I'm still alive. It's a lot more painful than I expected it to be, even now, two weeks post-surgery, and it really took a lot out of me. I'm back at work full time now, and at the end of the day I'm totally exhausted.

Let me heal up a little more, and I'll try to get back into it starting next Monday.

Thanks again for all of your notes of concern and congratulations. They meant a lot to me.

--Farnsworth

Dodged the Bullet!

One week ago tomorrow I had the end of my thumb amputated from the knuckle down, in an attempt to rid myself of a melanoma that was starting to get a strong grip on me.

The results of the biopsy of the thumb and the lymph glands in my left armpit are in: No metastasis!

I'm now as cancer-free as I was four and a half years ago, before I first noticed the telltale symptoms.

Of course, I am still in pain and find it difficult to type. But let the rejoicing go on without me for another week or so, and I ought to be back as good as new. Well, almost -- I am missing half a thumb. The best movie review I'll be able to give is "one and half thumbs up".

Thanks again to all of you who expressed your concern and sent the "healing thoughts" my way. I'll see you back here in a week or so.

Going Dark

I managed to get my surgery moved up by one week, so tomorrow bright and early I report in for my thumbectomy.

I'm assuming that they are going to give me some first class drugs to take, so I probably won't be blogging -- or doing much of anything other than watching the old movies that I recorded off the Turner Classics channel and drooling on my bib -- for the next week or so.

Thanks again for all of your kind words and healing thoughts. I'm sure everything will turn out fine.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597 2605 2619 2641
Total coalition forces dead: 230
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1816
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1263
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1225
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 200
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 45.

It is still 892 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic this fall!

Friday Cat Blogging

Too Fucking Stupid to be President #23455

Jesus Fucking Christ, who dresses the little fucker in the morning?

[Thanks (once again) to Bartcop for the image.]

American Fascism

Way back in 1944, before I was even born (and that's a long time ago), then US Vice President Henry Wallace had this to say:

The really dangerous American fascists are not those who are hooked up directly or indirectly with the Axis. The FBI has its finger on those. The dangerous American fascist is the man who wants to do in the United States in an American way what Hitler did in Germany in a Prussian way. The American fascist would prefer not to use violence. His method is to poison the channels of public information. With a fascist the problem is never how best to present the truth to the public but how best to use the news to deceive the public into giving the fascist and his group more money or more power.

The new rightwing talking point about radical Islamists is that they are "Islamo-Fascists". Nothing could be farther from the truth. They are Theocrats who are in no fundamental way different from their counterparts in the Taliban Wing of the Republican Party.

American Christianists want the same things as their Islamist brethren (and I use that word advisedly, since the "sisteren" on both sides have no real role): The merging of government and religion.

As Sinclair Lewis so famously said (a quote which adorns the right-hand column of this blog), "When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross."

The amoral Mayberry Machiavellians in the BFEE don't really give a fuck about religion except as a tool to sweep up the "useful idiots" among the great unwashed Moron-American voting bloc.

Their true goal is classic fascism: "A system of government that exercises a dictatorship of the extreme right, typically through the merging of state and business leadership, together with belligerent nationalism." (1983 edition of the American Heritage Dictionary)

Even the John Birch Society can recognize it: "...from the administration's perspective, the president is, in effect, our living constitution. This is, in a specific and unmistakable sense, fascist."

Now in my wildest imaginings I never thought I would be in agreement with the John Birch Society. About anything. But there it is.

Here's Henry Wallace again:

The American fascists are most easily recognized by their deliberate perversion of truth and fact. Their newspapers and propaganda carefully cultivate every fissure of disunity, every crack in the common front against fascism. They use every opportunity to impugn democracy.

We have an unhealthy -- an unholy -- alliance between business interests -- big business -- and the reins of power concentrated in the iron fist of the BFEE that will be very difficult to destroy. These fuckers mean business, and they will not willingly surrender the tremendous power that they have accumulated.

All the more reason to work -- and work hard -- for Democratic candidates this fall.

[Thanks to Thom Hartmann for the details on this.]

You Gotta Love This

The rightwing Dallas millionaires (now there's a redundancy) who bankrolled the Swift Boat Liars for Bush and the 2000 John McCain smear campaign are in hot water with the IRS.

Seems the Wyly brothers have managed to avoid paying a lot of taxes, thanks to a complicated scheme of offshore banking accounts.

This does not come as a surprise. It's so typical of those at the very top to develop the haughty feeling that they are somehow above the riffraff when it comes to supporting this country, and their little circle of Texas millionaires naturally includes the BFEE. What is surprising is that Baby Doc would allow the IRS to go after them. Their tax trangressions must have been so blatant, so over the top, that they couldn't be hidden any longer.

Or else there's a quiet revolt going on in the bowels of the maladministration, where even the lowliest bureaucrat is scrambling to be able to say "Bush? Hey, I barely knew the guy!"

Too bad the Wyly boys won't do any jail time. There's nothing like waking up with your new best friend Bubba to change your attitude about obeying the law.

Heckuva Job, Brownie

So why haven't we seen this particular piece of news bannered across every major daily newspaper in this country?

Michael "Heckuva-Job-Brownie" Brown, the former head of FEMA, came right out and said the White House asked him to lie about the agency's preparedness and take the heat for the bungled job.

"The lie was that we were ready and that everything was working as a team. Behind the scenes, it wasn't working at all," Brown said.

Wouldn't you think that this would be news, even to the craven cowards in the MSM/SCLM who serve as Baby Doc's bootlicking lickspittles? Would that be too much to ask?

I guess so.

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 826 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

The son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna. Will they follow him?

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

The "One Book" Bandwagon

I've never been above jumping on a blogosphere bandwagon (such as Friday Cat Blogging) when it coincides with my interests, and the current one going around is an interesting one. I don't know who started it, but I picked it up over at Is America Burning?

And, like everyone else, I complain because there are so many books to choose from, books that I've loved, books that I've hated, books that have changed my life. Nevertheless, here are the ones who made the final cut. Today. Ask me the same questions tomorrow and I might have completely different answers.

One book that changed your life
On the Road by Jack Kerouac
It was the early 60s when I first picked up On the Road, and it led to several stretches of time spent bumming around the country, abusing a variety of substances and living in communes. It changed my life, all right, but probably not for the better. If I hadn't read it, maybe I'd have stayed in college, majored in pre-law, become a Naval officer, married a liquor heiress, joined the astronaut corps and earned a Nobel Prize for Literature...
Naaah...

One book you have read more than once
1984 by George Orwell
Regular readers of this blog know how much I like this book, dystopian fiction at its very best, and an amazingly prescient prediction of the kind of society we're slipping into. I reread it every couple of years and never fail to find something new in it. Maybe because we are becoming more and more like Oceana every day.

One book you would want on a desert island
Devlin's Boatbuilding: How to Build Any Boat the Stitch-and-Glue Way by Samuel Devlin
I figure the only way off that fucking island is to build your own boat. Otherwise I'd go totally insane.

One book that made you laugh
Miles Walker You're Dead by Linda Jaivan
A wacked-out post-modern look at Australia on the eve of the millennium. On New Years Eve, artist Miles Walker is preparing to have himself blown up for his art because his friends have convinced him that dying young would be a good career move for him. Absolutely hilarious.

One book that made you cry
Tortilla Curtain by TC Boyle.
A relentless examination of the same themes found in John Steinbeck's Grapes of Wrath, updated for a new generation of migrant workers in California.

One book you wish had never been written
The Protocols of the Elders of Zion by Anonymous.
From their first appearance at the start of the 20th Century, the completely fraudulent protocols have whipped up fanatic hatred for Jews. But thanks to Henry Ford (yes, that Henry Ford), who pushed this ugly propaganda onto an easily-duped American public, a virulent strain of Anti-Semitism effectively blocked most efforts to do something -- anything -- to save the European Jews who were being systematically exterminated by the Nazis.

One book you are currently reading
Around the World on a Bicycle by Thomas Stevens
In 1884 Englishman Thomas Stevens set out from San Francisco on a high-wheel "penny farthing" bicycle on a ride around the world. Fascinating descriptions of places and people that he encountered along the way, and an amazing glimpse into how much has changed in the world in a little over 100 years.

One book you have been meaning to read
Mason and Dixon by Thomas Pynchon
Aside from the Bible, this has to be the least-read bestseller in history. It's been sitting on my bookshelf since I bought it new. I've taken it down and hefted it a couple of times, even read the first couple of pages. My literary friends are all in the same boat with me: I don't know one person who has actually read it. One of these days I'll manage to do it. Or maybe I'll just wait for the comic book version...

One book you wish you had written
Suspects by David Thomson
What starts out as a somewhat whimsical examination of the supposedly real lives of movie characters eventually takes on a more sinister tone and you slowly come to the realization that many of these characters interact in some way with the unnamed narrator, who ultimately turns out to be a famous film character himself. A master accomplishment and a must-read for film buffs, especially those who love the 1940s film-noir genre.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597 2605 2619
Total coalition forces dead: 230
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1809
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1256
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1218
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 193
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 38.

It is still 899 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic this fall!

Friday Cat Blogging

Penis Pumps in the News

Jeez, it never stops. Just a few days ago I remarked on the judge in my hometown getting four year for playing with a penis pump in his courtroom.

The latest development is an Iraqi man who was arrested by TSA officials when a female security guard at Chicago's O'Hare Field found a small squeezy rubber object in his backpack.

Mardin Amin was standing next to his mother when the offending object was plucked from his personal possessions and didn't want to yell out what it was. Instead he murmured out of the corner of his mouth the word "pump".

Leave it to the minimum-wage flunky to misunderstand him.

"Bomb" is what she heard and placed the man under arrest. And things spiraled out of control from there, with the result that this poor sap is now placed in the position of defending himself in court. The guard testified that he said the word "bomb", and the judge believed her.

In the meantime, Al Qaeda sleeper cells are making a run on the market and buying up penis pumps all over the world so they can turn them into bombs.

No, I don't know how they could do that, but while the TSA and the Dept of Homeland Insecurity are hassling this guy for the Muslim equivalent of Driving While Black, they are not on the lookout for the real terrorists.

What a fucking joke. Except Amin isn't laughing about it.

More "Backdoor Draft"

Despite the rosy predictions coming out of Field Marshal von Rumsfeld and the DOD, it looks like a bunch of discharged veterans from the so-called Ready Reserve are getting called back into uniform.

According to the news stories, up to 2500 Marines are getting the call to report back. In many cases, these are guys who have been out of the service for several years. Around 10,000 Army reservists have already been called back in the last three years.

The Christian Science Monitor has one of the most complete stories on this new and tragic development.

"Shortfalls in recruitment" in a number of military specialities are being blamed for this debacle. Yeah, there's a surprise. Who in the fuck would want to join up for a stint in the service knowing they'd be sent almost immediately to the Quaqmire in the Desert and get their asses shot off?

This marks the second time in three years that Baby Doc has authorized the Marines to call up these inactive reservists. Remember, we've been in the "last throes" of the insurgency since 2004. Two simultaneous wars have stretched troop levels to the breaking point, and yet the fuckers are still making big noises about invading Iran.

What this amounts to is a backdoor draft. Why can't they at least be honest about it and tell us the truth: We cannot fight a war on two fronts with an all-volunteer military, and we have to start a real draft.

But they don't want to do that, since the American people -- as stupid as many of them are about this whole fiasco -- this time just won't stand for the children of wealth and privilege dodging the draft by getting a bunch of student deferments (Cheney) or disappearing into a "champagne unit" of the Air National Guard (Bush) and then not even bothering to show up for duty. God forbid Jenna and Not-Jenna would have to don uniforms and show their support for their father's war.

So our reservists will be trucked off to the sandbox as cannon fodder and the rest of the country can go about its merry way without the sacrifices that, in a just world, ought to be borne by each and every American. But, in the words of Tom Delay, "nothing is more important in time of war than tax cuts".

New PTSD Study and the Media

There's a new study out on Vietnam vets verifying that about 19% of all Vietnam vets suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. And the study also proves that it can be devastating to those suffering from it.

So what does the media do with this new information?

"Fewer Vietnam Vets Suffer PTSD"
"Study Downsizes Number of Vietnam Vets Suffering from PTSD"
"Few Vets Suffer from Stress Disorders"

These are typical headlines from a Google News search. Granted, this percentage is down from the vastly inflated one-in-three figure that has been bandied about for the last several years -- a number that I doubted myself when I first heard it -- but mostly overlooked in all of these media stories is the fact that this new study has verified and validated PTSD for the veterans actually suffering from it.

Combat can leave lasting psychological scars. The new study establishes beyond doubt that the stresses of combat result in debilitating and devastating mental consequences later in life. Very few of the media stories focus on that aspect. (One of the notable exceptions is the Boston Globe story on the study.)

Instead most of the headlines tend to come off as dismissive of Vietnam vets and our whiny-assed crybaby attitudes.

The media ought to be focused on what this study means for the new crop of veterans coming home from Iraq and Afghanistan, but, like their masters in the BFEE, they don't really give a shit about veterans once they've wrung out of them the last drop of what they can give for the furtherance of the Empire.

Sign the "No Cure" Pledge

Jonathan Alter over at MSNBC came up with a good one, patterned after the "No Tax" pledge from a few years back.

All of the self-aggrandizing posturing politicians who stood up behind Baby Doc at his veto of the Stem Cell Research Bill ought to be consistent in their beliefs. To that end, Alter came up with this pledge:

Because of my strong opposition to embryonic-stem-cell research, I hereby pledge that should I, at any point in the future, develop diabetes, cancer, spinal-cord injuries or Parkinsons, among other diseases, I will refuse any and all treatments derived from such research, at home or abroad, even if it costs me my life.
Signed, ______

There were 37 senators and 193 house members who stood up in support of Prezdint Numnutz. Now they can take that one extra step to show their true commitment to The Cause, to show that it was not election-year posturing.

If you are represented by these troglodytes, please ask them to sign the pledge and demonstrate their true dedication.

And if they refuse to sign, let your local media know about it.

Torture and Coverup in Vietnam

Way back in the early 1970s a much-decorated Army light colonel named Anthony Herbert leveled charges, against officers and enlisted men of the 173rd Airborne Brigade, of torture of captured Viet Cong and NVA troops.

Those charges were widely publicized, which resulted in an internal Army investigation. In early 1973, then Chief of Staff General Creighton Abrams (formerly head of the Military Assistance Command, Vietnam, where he had replaced the discredited General William Westmoreland) received the news from the Army's chief of criminal investigations: The practice of torture and abuse went far beyond what Herbert had described.

However, there was also enough dirt on Herbert uncovered in the investigation to question his credibility, and so the Army went on the offensive against Herbert, instead of correcting the abuses. For his troubles, Herbert was savaged by, of all people, Mike Wallace on CBS's 60 Minutes -- an early example of the SCLM at work, doing the bidding of its corporate overlords who were in bed with the Nixon Administration -- and, also in typical fashion, that is what is remembered about Tony Herbert, and not the fact that he won a lawsuit against CBS.

So back to the torture: The investigators found that beatings, electric shocks and waterboarding (although it probably wasn't called that) were routine among the military interrogators in the 173rd, approved by their officers. At least one prisoner died at the hands of his interrogators.

Those abuses were never made public, and very few of the 29 suspected abusers were punished. In typical fashion, the only one who was really punished was Tony Herbert.

These facts were buried in a 9,000 page collection of documents that were once classified. However, in 1994 they were declassified and moved to the National Archives where they lay dormant until an enterprising group of reporters from the Los Angeles Times finally dug them out.

While I never witnessed prisoner abuse or torture while I was in Vietnam, there was no doubt that it took place with distressing regularity. Stories of throwing two bound prisoners out of helicopters in order to encourage the third one to talk were common, and the electric shock torture technique, usually conducted using a crank-phone electrical magneto, was widely and sardonically known as the "Bell Telephone Hour".

Anybody who tells you otherwise is either mistaken or just plain lying. We'd all like to think that we are an honorable nation who would never torture prisoners, blah blah blah, but the sad fact is that we are a warlike people whose blood lust can never truly be slaked. And it's not just the US, it's the whole human race. Among the oldest skeletons ever uncovered you can find the remains of primitive spear points that have struck bone.

It's a Secret Because We Say it's a Secret.

Can it get any more mundanely bizarre? Now the BFEE is refusing to tell anyone what they already told our former "enemy", the Soviet Union, years ago.

So what is it? The location of every US nuclear submarine? The identity of every US spy on the Eurasian land mass? How to make a zillion megaton bomb out of borscht and tsotchkes?

Nope, none of those. It's a simple number: How many nuclear weapons were in the US arsenal during the Cold War. Like I say, they already TOLD the Russkies, and now it's ancient history, on the order of the Third Punic War.

But it's now classified material. This is the most secretive administration in the history of this country, and this is just one small example of it.

So now I suppose that I will be bound for Gitmo when I release the number: It's 42.

That also, coincidentally, in case you recognize it, happens to be the answer to Life, the Universe and Everything...

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 819 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

The son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna. Will they follow him?

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

Disorder in the Court: Hometown Judge Gets Four Years.

I grew up in the little northeastern Oklahoma town of Bristow, so I'm always interested in news from there. But this isn't the kind of news that the city fathers like to see.

Donald Thompson, a Creek County judge with a courtroom in Bristow, has been sentenced to four years in the slammer for using a penis pump. On the bench. In court. During a jury trial.

Police built a case against the judge after a police officer testifying in a 2003 murder trial saw a piece of plastic tubing disappear under Thompson's robe. During a lunch break, officers took photographs of the pump under the desk.
Investigators later checked the carpet, Thompson's robes and the chair behind the bench and found semen, according to court records.

Wow. And eeeeyyyewwwwww.

Now see what happens? In the 1950s Oklahoma was a "blue" state. Now it's a "red" state, and sexual deviancy is running rampant, even in the hallowed halls of justice. Just goes to show you.

I hope the judge got some, shall we say, "positive results" from that penis pump. His new roommate, Bubba, is gonna appreciate it...

How Convenient...

Is it just me, or does the whole "I Killed Jon-Benet" story just fucking reek? And was it a coincidence that it comes out on the same day as -- and shoves off the front page the news about -- the judge in Detroit ruling that the BFEE wiretaps are illegal and unconstitutional?

The latest news on John Mark Karr and his "confession" to the police in Thailand is starting to show some unraveling around the edges:

• Karr said he gave Jon-Benet drugs; no drugs were found in her system.
• Karr says he raped Jon-Benet, but test conducted at the time showed no semen on her body.
• Karr's ex-wife says he was in Alabama with her every Christmas.
• Karr says he picked Jon-Benet up from school, but school was closed for the Christmas holiday
• There is no evidence that Karr even knew the Ramseys, or that he was ever in Colorado.

Watch for more unraveling in the next few days or weeks, and when the entire skein is spread out on the floor and they find it attaches nowhere to the case, the charges -- if any are ever even filed -- will quietly be dropped, the true murderer will still be at large, and Karr's life will be ruined. He obviously needs psychiatric help, but he will most likely not get it.

But hey, at least it moved the focus of the ADHD-suffering Moron-Americans off of what really counts and onto the Crime of the Century, conveniently brought there by the BFEE-controlled media.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597 2605
Total coalition forces dead: 230
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1802
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1249
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1211
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 186
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 31.

It is still 906 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic this fall!

Friday Cat Blogging

Judge Rules Wiretapping Illegal

A Federal judge in Detroit ruled in favor of the ACLU in its lawsuit over the warrantless wiretapping program. Unconstitutional, she said. Cease immediately, she said.

Now watch for the wingnut overreaction to another "activist" judge, calling for the Fundo-Xian equivalent of a fatwa against her.

Predictably the DOJ filed an appeal against the ruling. Never mind what Der Monkey Fuehrer/Liar-in-Chief said back in April 2004: "Now, by the way, any time you hear the United States government talking about 'wiretap', it requires -- a wiretap requires a court order. Nothing has changed, by the way. When we're talking about chasing down terrorists, we're talking about getting a court order before we do so.".

Of course he also told a member of his staff once upon a time to quit thowing the constitution up in his face all the time: "It's just a goddamn piece of paper!"

It's obvious that we're being led by an unruly two year old. Someone needs to give him his bottle and send him to bed; I think I liked it better when he was (openly) drinking.

They Are Watching You

I had a somewhat disconcerting phone call yesterday. I ordered a new computer from a reliable Internet site last week, and yesterday someone from India (naturally) calls me up to tell me that, since I had it shipped to my private mail box instead of my house, they had to ask a couple of questions to verify my identity. For my protection, of course. To prevent fraud.

So she tells me to let her know if I recognize any names in a list she's going to read off. I recognized the third name on the list: It was my wife, but the last name was the same as her ex-husband's. They have been divorced for 26 years! But apparently that doesn't matter. She still in my credit account under the name of her former husband.

Then she asked me to identify an address: 119 Lone Oak Road. I could identify it, but it also took me aback, since that was my parents' address, and they both died over 20 years ago.

So it's all there somewhere, in a big computer file. Everything about you, going back for years and years. Privacy is an illusion.

Even that "permanent record" they always threatened me with back in school is probably out there somewhere. Now that ought to make some interesting reading. But I hope it doesn't really exist: with all the "blowing stuff up" shenanigans that I pulled in my youth (firecracker pipe-bombs, long-twine time bombs, exploding hydrogen balloons, etc), it probably would get me on a bunch of terrorist watch-lists.

And I really hope no one dredges up the unfortunate incident involving the trained cormorant, the bishop's wife and the kangaroo in the steam bath...

Veterans Snub Allen, McCain

Even a power hitter like John McCain (R-Hypocrite) couldn't drum up support among his fellow veterans to attend a rally for George Allen (R-Racist Pig) in the Virginia senate race.

According to the story in the local newspaper, the best he could do was get a couple dozen veterans to come out for the rally -- and this was in Norfolk, for chrissake.

There were as many news media people there as veterans, and the whole thing sounds like it came off as a first class cluster fuck.

Of course it didn't help Allen at all when the clueless McCain made some lame-ass joke about a monkey flying an airplane. He didn't actually say it was a Macaque monkey, but that would be just asking too much. It would be icing on the cake.

Health Update

I went to the doctor today and found out what I had expected all along: I will lose my thumb from the first knuckle down. At least I'll have a little nub left over to do those really important opposible-thumb tricks, like tying my shoes, buttoning up my 501s and pinching young ladies on the butt.

Okay, just kidding about the last, but it's not as bad as it could have been. Of course, it's a little worse than it could have been, too. I found out that they will also do a small excision of the lymph nodes under my arm, to make sure that it hasn't spread.

My surgery is scheduled for September 13. At least it isn't a Friday...

Now, can anyone give me a crash course in base-nine arithmetic?

Short History of a Love Affair that Failed

This came in an email from a friend of mine. I don't know its origin, so I apologize for not giving the proper attribution.

The Double Nickel

As in 55. And that's not a speed limit I'm talking about. That's the number of Arabic language specialists who have been dismissed from the US military solely because they are gay.

If this isn't the most shortsighted, stupid and unnecessary military decision ever, then it's right up there with the top ten. (You can supply your own list -- whatever is on it will just have to move over and make room for this one.)

The latest victim of this onerous witch hunt, Army Sergeant Bleu Copas of the 82nd Airborne, was outed by a stream of anonymous emails to his commanding officer. After an investigation that lasted eight months the Army finally kicked him out, even though he never told investigators that he was gay, and the identity of his accusers remains unknown.

Now you would think, when we are apparently "at war" with the entire Arab world, the military would be doing everything possible to recruit and retain Arab language specialists. So once again I don't get what the fuck is going on in the minds of these Christo-fascist rightwing assholes, who seem to be focused on "aberrant" sexuality to the complete exclusion of everything else that really matters.

But there I go again, looking at things through the foggy spectacles of Reality.

It's Called Free Speech, Morons

Thomas Jakubisyn, a Vietnam vet who owns a liquor store in Milford CT, has a cartoon posted in the window of his store that depicts a soldier in camouflage and reads: "Out of Work? Undereducated? No Health Plan? Join the Army and see Iraq."

Naturally the local branches of the Military Fascists of America -- aka the American Legion and the VFW -- are complaining that it feeds into "an inaccurate stereotype that American soldiers are less educated and less employable".

Jakubisyn says that the cartoon has been in the window for the last three years, since shortly after the US launched its attack on Iraq and he has no intention of taking it down.

Maybe those idiots in the service organizations ought to take a look at that constitution that they swore to uphold, especially that part about free speech.

If you don't like it, then don't shop there. There are lots of other liquor stores in Connecticut, and in the meantime leave your fellow veteran the fuck alone. If I lived in Connecticut, I'd go miles out of my way just to buy my booze from Jakubisyn.

"Depleted" Uranium and Sick Veterans

In a story AP writer Deborah Hastings describes the results of exposure to so-called Depleted Uranium among the troops in the field:

It takes at least 10 minutes and a large glass of orange juice to wash down all the pills morphine, methadone, a muscle relaxant, an antidepressant, a stool softener. Viagra for sexual dysfunction. Valium for his nerves.

Four hours later, Herbert Reed will swallow another 15 mg of morphine to cut the pain clenching every part of his body. He will do it twice more before the day is done.

Since he left a bombed-out train depot in Iraq, his gums bleed. There is more blood in his urine, and still more in his stool. Bright light hurts his eyes. A tumor has been removed from his thyroid. Rashes erupt everywhere, itching so badly they seem to live inside his skin. Migraines cleave his skull. His joints ache, grating like door hinges in need of oil.

Read the whole sordid tale and prepare yourself for anger, frustration and disbelief.

A different kind of disbelief than Herbert Reed has faced when he's tried to hold his government -- our government -- accountable for the poisoning of America's troops.

"Depleted" uranium is anything but. It still holds 60% of its original radioactivity, and it's used not only in artillery shells but also in tank armor. On impact it explodes into zillions of microscopic fragments and creates a cloud of toxic dust with a half-life of 4.5 BILLION years.

And we're not only poisoning our own troops, but we are also leaving this radioactive cloud behind us, our legacy to Iraq. Our legacy to generations of Iraqi children yet unborn.

It's a war crime, and somebody needs to be held accountable for it.

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 812 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

The son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna. Will they follow him?

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

I'm Back

Thanks to all of you who expressed concern over my recent health alert. Here's the latest update.

Four years ago I had a melanoma appear under my left thumbnail, in the form of a black band that grew out the length of the nail. It started in the nail matrix, that part of the body that actually produces the hard substance of the nail. Fortunately the melanoma was still localized, and surgery removed it completely, along with the entire thumbnail. Eventually about 3/4 of the original nail returned, but it always looked pretty gnarly, like I had been hitting it repeatedly with a ball-peen hammer.

So fast-forward to now: I recently noticed a small brown irregular discoloration under the skin just beyond the outside edge of what remains of the left thumbnail, about a half-inch away from the site of the original melanoma.

One painful biopsy later I learn out that I have yet another melanoma on my left thumb. I am told that it, too, is localized, or in situ, and ought to be easily removed, but now I am wondering if maybe some more radical surgery might be called for. If I have some fucking cancer lurking in my thumb, lying in ambush for me to relax my immune response system just a smidgen, then I'd rather just have the whole thumb amputated and be done with it. I don't want to have increasingly larger body parts regularly hacked off, like Martin Balsam's character Mr. Merriweather in the classic film Little Big Man: "They're whittlin' me down, boy!"

I go to the surgeon on Thursday. Either I will have dodged the bullet again, or I'll be saying goodbye to my thumb as it begins its journey to Body Parts Heaven and struggling to learn base-nine arithmetic. I'll keep you posted.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585 2597
Total coalition forces dead: 230
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1795
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1241
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1204
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 179
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 24.

It is still 913 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic this fall!

Friday Cat Blogging

So Much to Say...

...and no way to say it.

I had a biopsy on my thumb a couple of days ago and the doc gouged out more than I expected him to. It is painful to type, and I am supposed to keep my thumb elevated and iced.

More on this painful topic when I get back, probably Monday. Look for the regular Friday features, though, since they are basically cut-and-paste.

Weekly "Bush Twins in Uniform" Watch

It has now been 805 days since Jenna and Not-Jenna Bush, the slacker offspring of Preznit Numnutz, graduated from college and they are still not in the uniform of the US armed services.

Why? Because they have other priorities. They are too busy partying down in Georgetown to show their support for the war by enlisting their chickenhawk-child selves into the military service, that's why.

Why can't they be like their royal counterparts in the UK? The Royal Family, unlike the Bush Crime Family, has a centuries-long tradition of honorable military service. Prince Andrew was a combat helicopter pilot in La Guerre de las Malvinas (aka the Falklands War), Prince William, direct heir to the throne, has entered Sandhurst (Britain's West Point), and little brother Prince Harry graduated from Sandhurst in April and could be on his way to Iraq as a cavalry lieutenant.

And now we learn that the son of Senator John McCain has enlisted in the US Marine Corps. That means that as soon as he's done with his training, he's going to be on his way to The Sandbox. Now there's a role model right in their own political party for Jenna and Not-Jenna.

Be sure to check out The Yellow Elephant blog, which asks the question "It's their war; why aren't they fighting it?"

BTW, they are also still not pregnant with their own Snowflake Babies. If they can't join the service, the least they could do would be to get themselves impregnated with a couple of blastocytes that would otherwise go into the garbage. Remember what Farnsworth always says: Baste 'em, don't waste 'em.

Friday by the Numbers

Total American dead in the Iraq Illegal Occupation: 2500 2513 2532 2540 2546 2558 2571 2585
Total coalition forces dead: 230
Total Iraqi Dead: 100,000+

Number of days since Baby Doc said he'd get Osama Bin Laden "dead or alive": 1788
Number of days since the illegal occupation of Iraq began: 1234
Number of days since "Mission Accomplished": 1194
Number of days between Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII: Only 1347
Number of days that the the Vice President has NOT shot a man in the face: 172
Number of days that the Bush Twins are still not pregnant with baste-'em-or-waste-'em Snowflake babies: 17.

It is still 920 days until the end of the BFEE Maladministration -- unless we impeach the whole sorry lot of the corrupt and criminal bastards.

Vote Democratic this fall!

Friday Cat Blogging

More Dueling Quotes

Donald Rumsfeld, August 2006:

Senator, I don’t think that’s true. I have never painted a rosy picture. I have been very measured in my words, and you’d have a dickens of a time trying to find instances where I have been excessively optimistic. I understand this is tough stuff.

Donald Rumsfeld, Dec 2002:

It [Afghanistan] is encouraging. They have elected a government through the Loya Jirga process. The Taliban are gone. The al Qaeda are gone.

Donald Rumsfeld, Feb 2003:

It is unknowable how long that conflict [the war in Iraq] will last. It could last six days, six weeks. I doubt six months. There is no question but that [American forces] would be welcomed

Donald Rumsfeld, Mar 2003:

It happens not to be the area where weapons of mass destruction were dispersed. We know where they are. They’re in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south and north somewhat.

I guess when every word out of your mouth for six years has been a lie, you kind of get in the habit of not telling the truth.

Thanks to Thnk Progress for this. They did not have a "dickens of a time" finding them.

Work for Tips, Get the Shaft

This one almost got by me. Bundled up in the Paris Hilton Relief Bill (you know, the one that couples billions in cuts to the inheritance tax with a paltry increase in the federal minimum wage) is a really nifto proviso that will allow restaurant and bar owners (and I suppose any other place where workers get tips) to pay less than the minimum wage, as long as the total compensation per hour comes up to at least the minimum wage.

It came as a surprise to me that employers in so many other states have been allowed to do this already, but this bill, if passed, will codify it into federal law, and the seven states that have decided to pay tipped workers the minimum wage regardless of tips will have to conform.

Those states are Montana, Alaska, Minnesota, Oregon, Nevada, California and Washington. Waitresses, bartenders, hairdressers, etc., will end up making less money at the end of the day than they make now. The Seattle Times ran an article today illustrating the dilemma faced by this state's food service workers:

In Seattle on Wednesday afternoon, Melody Swett, a server at the Westin Hotel, was among 100 members of various labor groups rallying against the bill in front of the Executive Inn, a couple of blocks from the Space Needle.
Swett, 56, has been working at the Westin for 31 years. Last year, she said, she earned about $35,000 in wages and tips. She said that when tourists are in town during the summer she could earn $100 or, occasionally, $200 a night in tips. In the winter months, she said, tips could drop to $5, $10 or $20 a night. The bartenders and runners bringing food get a 20 percent share of the tip money.
"If they get this bill passed, it'll cut my wages per month by over $900," she said. "Can you see the problem in that?"

And of course the meaty hands of the restaurant industry are all over this one, backed by their high-priced lobbyist/whore/asshole, Rick Berman.

Now it seems to me that these fuckers ought to really consider what they are doing. These assholes eat out in restaurants, banquets, etc. a lot. If they manage to ramrod this piece-of-shit legislation through and all of a sudden the people who are serving them their food are making a lot less money because of what they did... Well, I used to work in a pizza restaurant in my youth, and I can tell you from personal experience the last thing you want to do is piss off the person who is handling your food.

Just an observation, of course...

Special thanks to nunya over at Politickybitch for the heads up on this.

More Murtha News

Now it turns out that one of the Marines involved in what appears to have been a My Lai type massacre of twenty-some civilians in Haditha is suing John Murtha for slander, for what he is characterizing as "false and malicious lies" about him and the other Marines involved in the incident.

Never mind the fact that the evidence supports the allegations against the Marines. Remember, the truth has nothing to do with it.

I'd be interested in knowing who is bankrolling this guy. It woudn't surprise me a bit to learn that the purse strings have been loosened by the very same assholes involved in the Veterans for Truth attack on Murtha. And ultimately by the Rethug party itself, since there is no reason to doubt that this group, like its predecessor, is anything but another arm of the Ruling Party.

It's also interesting that the charge against Murtha is uttering "false and malicious lies". I guess these motherfuckers have no problem with plain old regular lies, just those that are "false and malicious".

And finally, I thought an article of faith for the Rethugs centered on so-called "tort reform" and the elimination of frivolous lawsuits. Or is that only for lawsuits that are filed against major corporations by the poor and the oppressed and the disenfranchised?

Swift Boat Liars to Attack Murtha

Like the burning drip of a venereal infection that won't go away, the latest reincarnation of Swift Boat Liars for Bush is planning an attack on Rep. John Murtha (D-PA). Now they're going by the Orwellian-named Veterans for Truth, but it's still the same old gang of mouth-breathing wingnut assholes.

According to a UPI story from yesterday, this Pavlovian pack of butt-sniffing dick dogs, originally a wholly-owned subsidiary of the Rethug party set up to attack John Kerry's war record in 2002, will stage a "rally" targeting Murtha, an outspoken critic of the BFEE mishandling of the Quaqmire in the Sand. Murtha is "letting down" the troops in Iraq, according to these kool-aid drinking morons. Their pathetically ironic theme, "Redeploy John Murtha", I suppose is meant to somehow be clever but it's not -- it's just lame and weak and stupid.

This really doesn't come as a surprise. These fuckers got a little taste of corrupt power when they attacked a fellow veteran in 2002, and like a meth-head pimping his grandmother for one more nickle bag, they will slavishly do the bidding of their whip-wielding masters for just one more taste of blood.

But this time I think they've bitten off more than they can chew. Jack Murtha, a Korean War Marine veteran who also volunteered for duty in Vietnam, won't just lie down and take any lying crap off of these pricks. It's going to be fun watching the Old Warrior take off the gloves and bitch-slap the shit out of them.

Stay tuned.