Disorder in the Court: Hometown Judge Gets Four Years.

I grew up in the little northeastern Oklahoma town of Bristow, so I'm always interested in news from there. But this isn't the kind of news that the city fathers like to see.

Donald Thompson, a Creek County judge with a courtroom in Bristow, has been sentenced to four years in the slammer for using a penis pump. On the bench. In court. During a jury trial.

Police built a case against the judge after a police officer testifying in a 2003 murder trial saw a piece of plastic tubing disappear under Thompson's robe. During a lunch break, officers took photographs of the pump under the desk.
Investigators later checked the carpet, Thompson's robes and the chair behind the bench and found semen, according to court records.

Wow. And eeeeyyyewwwwww.

Now see what happens? In the 1950s Oklahoma was a "blue" state. Now it's a "red" state, and sexual deviancy is running rampant, even in the hallowed halls of justice. Just goes to show you.

I hope the judge got some, shall we say, "positive results" from that penis pump. His new roommate, Bubba, is gonna appreciate it...