Monday, January 28, 2008

A Sleepless Night

I really shouldn't let my imagination run loose when I'm trying to go to sleep. Here are the nightmare scenarios that kept me up until the wee hours.

Setup:

The next president dies in office, and his vice president, under the US constitution (which is still more or less in effect, even though it's currently on life supports), becomes president.

Scenarios:

John McCain, the apparent front-runner in the Rethug race, would be 71, making him the oldest president ever, at the the time he is sworn in next January. (By comparison, Saint Ronald was a youthful 69 at the time he took office.) Despite the fact that McCain regularly keeps trotting out his doddering 95-year-old mother to prove that he has longevity genes, he's already had skin cancer and his body has to be a lot less than 100% after his wild youth (I "generally misused my good health and youth" -- source) and those five-and-a-half long years of torture and lack of medical care as a guest of the North Vietnamese.

In order to shore up his support among the mouthbreathing knuckledragging Fundo Xian branch of the party, McCain chooses Huckleberry Hucklebee as his VP. McCain dies and Huckleberry starts in on his campaign to restore Christian principles to the US constitution and, with the compliance of the spineless Blue Dog Democrats and the Dominionist-packed Supreme Court, slides us into theocracy.

And the Dems? Barack Obama is a prime target for assassination (a Google search for "assassinate obama" turns up some 14,000 terrifying hits). Let's face facts: Anyone who does not believe that there is a deep-seated and virulent strain of violent racism lurking just beneath the surface in many parts of this country is living in a fool's paradise. The current wide-eyed comparisons between him and JFK are downright scary when you remember what happened to Kennedy.

If Obama is the nominee, he will just about have to choose Billary as his VP running mate (and vice-versa). By the time of the Democratic Convention the party will be badly wounded by the current infighting that's going to only get worse. The best way to try to heal up those wounds would be to choose your enemy as your running mate and pretend that you have always been best buddies (as Reagan did with "Poppy" Bush, and JFK seems to have done with Lyndon Johnson). Then Obama dies in office. She is president, and she will continue the slide into fascistic corporatism that was started by Ronald Reagan and sadly continued, in large part, by Bill Clinton.

Jeez, I think I need a Xanax/Ambien cocktail...

8 Comments:

Anonymous said...

When I'm lying in bed staring at the ceiling, I will curse you, Farnsworth! Curse you!

Or maybe I'll thank you for giving me something besides money woes to worry about.

Anonymous said...

What if Obama selects John Edwards as his running mate?
Problem solved. We know that Edwards isn't about to cave in the
corporate pigs. He's been fighting them for decades as a malpractice attorney.
This posting might help your followers sleep better, as well.

The Truffle said...

I could see Edwards as an attorney general. Who else agrees?

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Cheney would be interested in the V.P. position... we can only hope ;)

Anonymous said...

Sorry I am confused do presidential candidates usually chose a person they ran against and beat in the primary to be the vice president?

And btw if you do the assassinate obama search and replace it with bush there are actually 900 more results. Although Fox news rates the first two for bush and is not seen in the first page for obama...???

Really I never paid attention before to how the vice president is chosen...

Besides, you are wrong on this one. There will be terrible terrorists activities near election time that will cause shruby to install martial law and continue to be president! Lay awake and think about that one...

Anonymous said...

Hey drainbamaged,

I think your predicition continues with the other moonbat predictions liberals made during the 2004 elections that "Bush has UBL already captured and is going to parade him just before the election" Or... "Bush's friends the Saudi's are going to lower oil prices right before the election to help him"

Farnsworth68 said...

Debby -- I think an Obama-Edwards or an Edwards-Obama ticket would be a dream combination.
I would have no problem at all supporting either of those scenarios.
My biggest fear is that Billary will be the Dem's HMFIC nominee, and that I will have to choke back my pride and my own values, and go against pretty much everything I believe in, to campaign for her.
Jeez...

Unknown said...

I just hope sHillary isn't on the ticket..thats all I want..a sHillary-less Democratic ticket.