Sunday, October 02, 2011

The Proof Is In! Living Will Kill You

The latest non-issue is a report that eggs are now back to being bad for you.

And I had to read this right after I ate two homemade eggs on muffins for breakfast.

But not so fast. This study actually says that they found a "suggestion" which "was not statistically significant" and yet they published a screaming-headline story to the effect that eggs may increase the risk of developing lethal prostate cancer.

News flash: If you are a man and you live long enough not to die of something else, you will most likely get prostate cancer.

I'm now trying to get some Federal bucks to validate my own study that breathing air will kill you. My proof: Everyone who has ever died breathed air -- and probably a lot of it -- before they shuffled off this mortal coil...

Now it's just a question of sitting back and waiting for that generous handout.

2 Comments:

A World Quite Mad said...

Well, oxygen in it's pure form is a poison. And you aren't getting out of this life alive anyway >:D

I eat about three to six eggs a day. They're my favorite food. I love them scrambled, fried, boiled, but my favorite is coddled or poached. I figure I haven't dropped dead yet so I think that I'll keep eating them and disregard any "medical" advice from the "experts."

Farnsworth68 said...

Yeah! You da man!
I love eggs, too, and it'll be a cold day in hell before I stop eating them. A few years back, right after my "stroke", when She-Who-Must-Be-Obeyed got overly soliticious about my health, she got on one of those "eggs will kill you" kick.
After much wrangling over the issue -- and much research on the Internets -- she finally threw up her hands in frustration and said, "Go ahead! Kill yourself! Just make sure your life insurance is paid up!"
I did, I paid, and yet here I am, still kicking.
Go figure.
--The F Man