Friday, February 06, 2015

This Guy Is Still Alive?

Pat Boone. The very name conjures up some vague and misty saccharin-sounding memories of the 1950s, what with writing love letters in the sand and all that. Never mind that devil-made-me-do-it "heavy metal" album he made in what, the 1980s?

I'm surprised to learn that he is still alive and writing for that wingnut wacko website, WorldNetDaily. Remember them? --- they are the ones famous for "swiftboating" John Kerry way back in 2004.

Now, thanks to Wonkette, we learn that not only has Pat Boone's career path taken an ugly turn or two, but that now he is officially not only batshit crazy but also senile:

This is the 50th anniversary of the film “Doctor Strangelove.” Ironic, if not prescient. […] There’s a different scenario unfolding in this country we love, right before our eyes, and we’re reading about it in the daily papers and seeing it on the nightly news broadcasts. What if our elected leadership had decided America no longer deserved to be leader of the free world, should have its military and its programs reduced to ineffectual status, our vibrant economy bankrupted, and that our republic should be “fundamentally transformed” into a virtual socialist, if not outright communist, society?
Cue Scooby Doo: "Unh-Hyunhhhnh???"
What if the elected president and his attorney general, both sworn to defend the Constitution and the security of the United States, decided – even made public statements – that they would not defend the laws concerning our borders and a mass invasion by illegal aliens, including near certain terrorists with plans for future 9/11 style attacks in our own cities? Even crazier than “Doctor Strangelove,” right? Couldn’t happen? But wait. Are you old enough to remember the name Willie Horton?
Willie Fucking Horton? Really, Pat? Really?

Well, Pat, I guess it's time for you to put on some of those White Buck Shoes and kick some Negro ass. But you know, not all the Negroes -- just them white-woman-rapin' Negroes. Like Willie Horton. Not the "good Negroes" -- I'm sure you know one or two.

Goddammit, I wish I had some old Pat Boone records, just so I could toss them into a record-burnin' bonfire. The same bonfire that the wingnut Religious Right wackos used to burn "the devil's music" back in the day. The same bonfire that the Rethugs and those in their righteous thrall used to burn The Dixie Chicks records because one of them, the dastardly unpatriotic BITCH, had the nerve to criticize Baby Doc Bush. In public.

But sad to say, I never really had any Pat Boone records. I had a lot of Chuck Berry, Buddy Holly, Little Richard (back before he went religio-insane) and the like. But none of that spongey-fuck crap that sounded like the singer (i.e., Pat Boone) had a mouthful of Santorum...

3 Comments:

Nan said...

He's always been batshit crazy. It just wasn't as obvious back in the '60s.

Katy Anders said...

"Its military and its programs reduced to ineffectual status"? What does that even mean?

I just read an article where a general is bemoaning the fact that Congress is buying the Defense Dept tanks it "doesn't need and can't use." The idea that our military is being stripped back to dangerous levels is a mantra without substance.

However, I hate to even give Pat Boone credibility by debating any of his points. "Roger and Me" is really all I needed to know about him. I know, I know, it was Michael Moore movie, but it was Boone making the crazy Jewish jokes on camera.

Let's move on to a credible conservative celebrity like Chuck Woolery or Jon Voigt. Oh, well, never mind, I guess...

the yellow fringe said...

"near certain terrorists" What the hell is that?