Well, it is now Saturday morning and we're still here! Escaped god's eclispical judgment, again! I'm beginning to think He's not all that serious about this shit.
Anyway, since we are still alive and in one piece, how about a little humor to enliven your weekend:
A duck goes into a pharmacy and says, "Gimme a tube of chapstick and put it on my bill."
The next day the duck goes back into the pharmacy and says, "Gimme a condom."
"Certainly," the pharmacist says. "Do you want me to put it on your bill?"
"No!" the duck says. "Whattaya think I am, some kinda pervert?"