The Beast of Revelation? It's Fox News!

I am not making this up. If you assign its numerical value to each of the letters in F-O-X, you get something pretty really scary:

F = 6 (i.e., it's the sixth letter of the alphabet, so it's "6")
0 = 15 (add them together: 1+5= "6")
X = 24 (add them together: 2+4= "6")

FOX = 666!!!

And 666*, as all Biblical "scholars" know, is The Number of the Beast in the schizophrenic hallucinogenic-mushroom-infused fever-dream that is the so-called Book of Revelation.

Jesus! It's right there! Wake up, all you fundo Christianists! You are watching the official media outlet of Satan himself!!!!

* Unless it really is "616", as it appears in many early manuscripts of Revelation, in which case all bets are off. Unless ... F-A-X would fit nicely into this little adventure in apophenia, meaning that all fax machines are the tools of the devil.

But, regardless of the numbers, the world will still end, all Arby's coupons will be null and void, and alternate-side-of-the-street parking will be suspended.

Jesus is coming, look busy!

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[HT to this Newscorpse story for the numerology demonstration]