For years my inbox, along with yours and everyone else's on the planet, has been inundated with get-rich-quick schemes usually involving a dead African and millions in dollars or Krugerrands or diamonds, etc.
This is called generically an Advance Fee Fraud, but because so many of its modern perpetrators are Nigerians, it became universally known as the Nigerian Letter or the 419 Scam (after the appropriate article of Nigerian law).
So it was with a mixture of relief and amusement that yesterday I got an email from someone representing himself to be one Captain James Adams, currently on duty in Iraq.
Here's what my new good buddy had to say:
I am CPT Adams, James of the US Marine Force on Monitoring and Peace keeping mission in Baghdad-Iraq. I know this may not be the proper way of contacting you based on the nature of my proposal but this is the only means avaliable to me here.You gotta hand it to these guys, they just don't give up.
On the 27th day of August 2006, we were alerted on the sudden presence of some Terrorists camping in a suburb not too far from Karbala here in Iraq. After Immediate intervention, we captured three (3) of the Terrorists, twenty-six (26) were killed leaving seven (7) injured.
In the process of torture they confessed being rebels for late Ayman al-Zawahiri and took us to a cave in Karbala which served as their camp. Here we recovered several guns, bombs and other Ammunitions including some boxes among which one filled with hard drugs(cocaine) and the other two to my amazement contain some US Dollars amounting to $17.2M. I however instructed my junior intelligent officers to keep this in high secrecy.
I am in keen need of a reliable and trustworthy person like you who would receive, secure and protect these boxes containing the US Dollars for me till my assignment elapses in here in Iraq as the boxes have already been moved out of Iraq. I assure and promise to give you 25% of this fund, however feel free to negotiate what you wish to have as your percentage in this business.
Please assure me of your keeping this topmost secret to protect my job with the US Monitoring and Peace-Keeping mission. If you will assist me, please send me your response including your name, telephone and address to my personal email: email@example.com
CPT Adams, James
And now, for an interesting response to these jokers, see the scam-baiting Scam-o-rama: The Lads from Lagos page, wherein, among other things, an erstwhile victim turns the tables on his new best buddies and gets them to send HIM money! Priceless.