Rootin' for Newton

Okay, I just can't help myself. After looking at the polling results in Florida, it looks like Mint Rawmoney is pulling ahead of our boy Newt in tomorrow's primary, but I still can't help but root for The Newt to somehow pull it out at the end.

And that's because I think Newtie would be the ideal candidate for Obama to trounce in the November election. But we are now seeing, in its most raw form, the pernicious and corrupting influence that money has on politics after the infamous Citizens United SCOTUS decision.

Mittens now is way ahead in the polling, not a surprise after he outspent The Gingrinch by a factor of something like four to one.

I heard a joke on the radio today: Someone asked a guy why he developed an instantaneous dislike for Mitt Romney, and he said that it saved him time...

So the Rethug party is faced with a very odd choice. They can either support a guy who is so rich he can buy Congress lock stock and barrel, who is also a devout member of the Mormon Church, or they can support one of the two Catholics who are still in the race. And this is a party that has its base in the old Solid South, filled with knuckledragging cretins who hate Catholics and who think that Mormonism is not Christian but rather is in fact an out-and-out cult.

May you live in interesting times...

The Gift That Keeps On Giving...

Newtie Gingrich
Crawled out of his ditch
And shot off the legs of his rival.

And with that little piece of song-parody doggerel, I am celebrating the victory of Fig Newton Gingrich over Mittens Rawmoney in South Carolina yesterday.

If anyone on the Rethug side ought to be easy to beat come November, it's Newt.

Yayy!!!

In Your Fucking Dreams, Newtie

I really wish I had the confidence that Newtie G. will never get the Rethug nomination, let alone win the 2012 election, that this headline implies, but I've pretty much given up trying to understand, let alone "misunderestimate", the Moron-American Voting Bloc.

Now that Newtie G. is officially in the race, you'd think that some of his supporters -- or those who think they are supporting him because they remember hearing his name sometime and wasn't he the guy with that Contract on America thing? -- would actually look that gift horse in the mouth.

Over at Mother Jones, Tim Murphy and David Corn have put together a compilation of statements flowing from the diseased gums of the man-who-would-be-king. It's called Newt in His Own Words: 33 Years of Bomb-Throwing, wherein you'll find, among many more, these "greatest hits":

1980 On the House floor, Gingrich states, "The reality is that this country is in greater danger than at any time since 1939."
1985 Gingrich calls Reagan's upcoming meeting with Mikhail Gorbachev ''the most dangerous summit for the West since Adolf Hitler met with Chamberlain in 1938 at Munich.''
1994 He sums up his political philosophy: "People like me are what stand between us and Auschwitz. I see evil all around me every day."

Okay, enough of that. See a pattern developing here. Newt is so swept up in the events leading to WWII that he sees a Munich behind every treaty, an umbrella-toting Neville Chamberlain lurking inside every Democratic politician.

The scary thing is that this thrice-married family values fraud is probably more likely than any of his current Rethug contenders (Michelle Bachmann? Mike Huckabee? Get real.) to actually get the nomination. And if that happens, then it's just one October-surprise international-crisis black eye for the black president, and Our Hero will come galloping to the rescue.

This is some scary shit, and one more reason why I lie awake at night...